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3 December 2013

Saturated


The last few months have been so busy, mainly with family stuff, and I haven't had the time or energy to be very active on the dating scene. On one hand it's good, I probably benefited from having some time after the split with Mr Lovely and my libido hasn't exactly been roaring of late. I have missed some other aspects of being poly though, like hanging out with a variety of people. 

The space from dating and the stability of my relationship with Daddy has given me the opportunity to reevaluate some of the methods of been using to date. I'm aware that I need to maximise my dating pool without viewing fundamentally incompatible people as potential partners. I've been reassessing my instant rejection of people new to polyamory (Noobs) or people who haven't heard of it before but may be suited to such a relationship style (Didn't Even Knows). My thinking was that instantly rejecting such people would minimise the chances of me bonding with someone and them suddenly requiring monogamy from me or, less horrid but still sucky, from someone else. I wasn't entirely comfortable with not giving Noobs the benefit of the doubt though, or giving Didn't Even Knows the chance to learn about something that may be beneficial to them. The fear of the Mono Ultimatum/Bail Out has always won, however. I'm reconsidering this though, I still have the fear but I'm going to try to be open to this group of men by replying to their messages or even approaching them myself. When I've got more time to date again, of course. 

I've been considering going to some Poly meet ups and munches too. I'm not great at interacting with new people fact-to-face but I think it will definitely be a way of maximising our dating pool as well as the bonus of friends we make along the way. I've had quite a bit of time to think about my love life over the past few months and I think it's nearly time for it to become lively again.